Attracting The Love I Want
How Do I Find Him/Her?
By: Stephanie S. Franklin, Esq., “Mecca”
Attracting the love you want is simple. Be the love you want to receive.
Oftentimes, we complain about our challenges in finding love. Our chief complaint is that the people we are attracting are not at all what we want. And this may very well be true. But, the key to attracting the love you desire is to focus your intention on what you desire. Intention is powerful. We manifest anything we want with our intention on a daily basis. Think about it. Reflect back to a time when you focused, with clear intention, on something that you wanted to achieve. You achieved it didn’t you? You always do. Unbeknownst to many of us, we always achieve what we focus on whether positive or negative. But because we may ignore the thoughts that dominate our mind, we fail to recognize that these dominant thoughts are the experiences that we create and live on a regular basis.
The mind is powerful!
The mind is powerful! More powerful than we are trained to believe. This is why theories such as self-fulfilling prophecy and labeling hold so much weight. What you believe you are, you become. What you are labeled, you become. However, this cycle can be circumvented through understanding the power of the mind.
Thoughts are energy, energy that can manifest itself into a physical reality if you have focused intention on creating that reality. Let’s look at some examples. You wake up in the morning and you are feeling mean, angry and negative, and your mindset is reflecting these feelings. If you make no effort to change your mindset, it is guaranteed that the rest of your day you will attract negative and toxic experiences. This is law. If you wake up feeling peaceful, loving and positive, it is guaranteed that you will attract peaceful, loving and positive experiences throughout your day. Try it and see what you attract.
Discipline Your Thoughts
You have the power to change your reality by modifying and disciplining your thoughts. What holds us from obtaining the love we want is our focus on what we don’t want. Anything you focus your attention to will manifest itself in physical form. Focusing on what you do not want will only create what you do not want. This is why we attract the loves in our lives that we feel are not right for us.
So why do we continue to do this? We do this because latent in our subconscious mind is the belief that the negative is what we deserve. The truth in our deepest soul is that we fear healthy, loving relationships and we believe that we are undeserving of them. And because of this, we focus our energy on the unwanted, never thinking of the true desire. We are socialized to focus on fear and lack and must re-train ourselves to focus on courage and abundance. Abundance is the manifestation of deservedness. Courage is the manifestation of belief. I challenge you to reflect and ponder your present and previous relationships. What patterns emerge? Lack? Fear? Unworthiness?
Relationships Are About You
Relationships that you experience are always about you! Follow the patterns of the issues in all relationships that you have experienced and it is guaranteed that there are one (1) to (2) core themes. The relationships and people may differ, but the lessons are always the same. The lessons will continue to be the same unless you deal with the underlying core issue that is attracting the experience. This is why focusing on what you desire, whether this is challenging to you or not, is critical to receive what you desire. But in order to attract what your soul truly desires, you must become a vibrational match for that experience. To become that vibrational match, you must work at resolving the underlying core issues that create your perpetual experiences.
An example of how this works is this, a gentleman repeatedly attracts women that consistently use him financially and emotionally. The gentleman has been in several relationships and regardless of the perceived differences in the relationships, the same issue re-occurs for him, and that issue is that women constantly use him financially and emotionally. Because of his consistent experiences, he always thinks and says “the next person that I get involved with is not going to use me financially and emotionally.” Unbeknownst to him, his focus on the thoughts and language of being financially and emotionally used, amplify attracting that which he does not want!!
Reframe Your Language
Thoughts and language hold power. Reframe your language. Control your thoughts. Focus on your desired outcome and your desired love, and you will achieve it. In the example above, the gentleman can reframe his thoughts and language and say, “My next love is financially and emotionally independent.” This is an example of a positive, affirmative statement that can attract exactly what the gentleman desires.
Be The Love You Want
To attract the love you want, be the love you want. If you want a love that is generous, be generous. If you want a love that is dependable, be dependable. If you want a love that is honest, be honest. Become the vibrational match for what you desire! Think it. Speak it. Believe it. And you can manifest it! Be appreciative and grateful for what you currently have. Gratitude will create more of what you desire!
But always remember, you must work the underlying core issue that consistently emerges. For instance, in the example above, the repetitive theme that the gentleman above is experiencing in all his relationships indicates his underlying core issue is worthiness. He must take active steps to believe he is worthy in order to attract the love he desires. Failure to resolve core issues will result in repetition of the issue, which will get you exactly what you don’t want…the same relationship that you’ve experienced in the past!
Practical Tips and Exercises:• Purchase a journal and pen/pencil that speaks to you. • Find a comfortable place where you will experience peace and solitude and will be undisturbed. • Ensure that your physical environment where you experience peace and solitude is physically pleasing to you (playing light music, burning candles, incense and aromatic oil burners, etc.) • Find 15 minutes or more in your day to write in your journal about the positives and challenges of your relationship. Journal these thoughts in the physical space that you have identified as a place of comfort that is peaceful and where you will find solitude. • Create two (2) columns that designate positives and challenges in your relationship and write these issues under the appropriate column. • Ask yourself and answer six (6) questions. Review your past relationships. • How did each relationship make you feel? • What were the positives in the relationship? • What were the challenges in the relationship? • Why did the relationships end? • What would I change about my past relationships? • What would I do different in my future relationships? Continue this exercise consistently. Through consistent intention and action, patterns will emerge that speak to the underlying issues of your past relationships and will give you answers to unlocking the door which leads to the pathway of attracting the love you want. Stephanie S. Franklin, Esq., “Mecca”Empowering individuals, families and communities. |
